Man lebt halt doch schon aufm Land;)
Things I have learned living in Oklahoma---
1. Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Oklahoma ...
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Oklahoma....plus a couple no one's ever seen before.
4. If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.
5. Onced and twiced are words.
6. It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.
7. Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.
8. People actually grow and eat okra.
9. Fixinto is one word.
10. There is no such thing as "lunch". There is only dinner and then there is supper.
11. Ice tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!
12. Backards and forwards means "I know everything about you."
13. 'Jeet?' is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
14. You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.
16. You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM OKLAHOMA IF:
1. You measure distance in minutes.
2. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
3. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: "I'm fixing to go to the store".
4. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
5. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
6. You know what a "DAWG" is.
7. You carry jumper cables in your pickup...for your OWN pickup.
8. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.
9. The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.
10. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
11. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm".
12. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, still Summer and Christmas.
13. You know whether another okie is from, north or south as soon as they open their mouth.
14. Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as "goin' Wal-martin" .
15. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good pinto-bean weather.
16. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop. It's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.
Example: "What kinda coke you want?"
17. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
18. We don't need no stinking driver's ed....if our mama says we can drive, we can drive.
19. You understand these jokes and forward them to your friends from Oklahoma (and those who just wish they were).
Not EVERYONE can be an Okie, it's an art form and a gift from God!
You’re from Oklahoma if...
- You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.
- It doesn't seem odd to see the term "chicken fried chicken" on a menu.
- You have used the phrase "fixin' to" during the last 12 months.
- Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
- A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
- It doesn't seem peculiar if your spouse says "I'm going in to town for something" even though you live in town.
- You can properly pronounce Eufaula, Gotebo, and Okemah.
- You think that people who complain about the wind in other states are sissies.
- A bad traffic jam involves two cars staring each other down at a four-way stop, each determined to be the most polite and let the other go first.
- You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
- Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
- You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
- You measure distance in minutes.
- You refer to the capital of Oklahoma as "The City."
- You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
- You have known someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.
- A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Ford F350 4x4 is.
- You know everything goes better with Ranch.
- Your nearest neighbor is in the next area code.
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